Signing off.

I arrived home safe and sound on Monday. Since then, I've been trying to find a normal sleeping schedule and adjust to... everything.

I can't believe that I'm home. When I arrived in Chiang Mai, nine months seemed like FOREVER. This past year has been one of the hardest and richest times in my twenty-three years. I learned. I struggled. Sometimes I thought I would never survive. But I did. I'm sure that now I don't realize how much I have changed and grown.

I won't miss everything about Thailand. I won't miss the traffic. I won't miss the pollution. I won't miss the heat and humidity. But I will miss the smell of chilis that makes my nose run. I'll miss the way the mist hangs over the tops of the mountains in the early morning. I'll miss my friends. I know I'll go back to Thailand some day. It's hard not to know when. But I know I'll go back. Thailand is a part of me; every time I say goodbye, my heart breaks a little.

I've decided to retire this blog. It was meant to make it easier to update all of you about my life while I was in Thailand. Thanks for sticking with me, thanks for your prayers and encouragement.

God bless.

The last blog post in Thailand...

Dear friends,

In a few hours, I will fly from Chiang Mai to Bangkok and then fly from Bangkok to LAX. If you would pray for safe and hassle-free traveling, I would really appreciate it. I'll be writing a longer post once I get home, but for now I can't really process what is going on.

So, sawatikhaa and chok dii.

Megan

"Writing a poem is discovering." - R. Frost

Luke 7: 37 - 47

Dust fills deep creases
Like a map of footsteps
Already taken.
One toenail is black.

Her tears anoint Him.
Her sins flow between His toes.
She kneels,
Touching her cheek to His ankle.
One thick braid
Erases her pain
From the soles of His feet.

Alabaster splinters.
Aroma spills.
Bergamot, almond, cardamom;
Oil separates
From salty water.

Her sins have been forgiven;
She loved much.

Super Tuesday.

A few weeks ago, one of my students (Sirikanya, a first-year English major) stopped me after class. She wanted to know all about the American primaries. She asked me whether I was a Democrat or a Republican and wanted to know who I voted for. I was thrilled to hear that if she was an American citizen, she would support Barack Obama for president.

I asked her why she was interested. She replied that the US has a lot of influence in the world, and to be a responsible citizen of Thailand, she needs to be informed about what happens in the world. I was proud of her and told her so. I try to incoporate current events from around the world in my classes; unfortunately, a lot of my students are completely uninterested.

I can't take credit for her global-mindedness, but at least I can say she is my student!

Current reading list...

Tom Jones, by Henry Fielding

The Mill on the Floss, by George Eliot

The Human Factor, by Graham Greene

A Book of Memories, by Peter Nadas

Final exams.

I can't believe my last semester teaching at CMU ended two weeks ago. Now I am buried up to my ears in final exams, trying to have them all graded by the deadline. I have exactly 150 students, so multiply that by about 7 - 10 minutes, and you get a whoooole lot of time spent grading. As a student, all you have to do is take the exam. The teachers have to grade them! At least the exams are made out of recycled paper.

Grading exams is always frustrating and a little demoralizing. Quite a few of my students will flunk the course. At least, they would flunk if the grades weren't curved. I don't get any input on the curve or the cutoff points, so it is hard for me not to feel like my grades are obsolete. Also, the senior professors have the authority to change the grades I give. Yes, that is right. They can arbitrarily decide that my grades are too high/ too low and tell me that I have to change them. Without my consent. This drives me CRAZY, and I think it is actually very unethical. That hasn't happened yet, but I get frustrated just thinking about it.

(Deep breath). Oh well. Now, if I was president of the world...

... I would make ALL final exams oral. We would save some trees AND have less exams to grade! Perfect.

More pictures!